Living in Liminality?

    "I think there are probably more people who sort of think & suspect they might have had an awakening - then they actually have. And that’s good news if that’s you, because there’s something pretty amazing waiting. This is the birth of the awakening process or birth of the process of liberation, of realization."
    Angelo DiLullo "Stages of Awakening (57-minute Intro)" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PM2oHMDfRhM

    Most readers of this blog, and many people in general, have had mystical experiences. HOWEVER you, dear readers, are probably aware that your experiences were mystical, AND are also curious about & motivated to go deeper into the mystery. You're in a transitional threshold, YET possibly uncertain about proceeding. 

     YOU will very likely find Angelo Dilullo's 7-minute "pointing" surprisingly valuable: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nEr5VLIf_eM 

     Notice the on-going tug-of-war between your brain's left hemisphere (Iain McGilchrist  https://www.google.com/search?client=firefox-b-d&q=iain+mcgilchrist+youtube#fpstate=ive&vld=cid:bb7bff33,vid:C85Vyq-yQtk,st:1750 ) loudly, persistently ordering you to do something else, be somewhere else, and be someone else. Meanwhile your right hemisphere is whispering you are unconditionally loved as you are, so there's 'nothing to do, nowhere to go, no one to be.' 

    Under stress, fear & anxiety, the left hemisphere is particularly loud, making us tremble to do something - no matter how irrelevant, and madly ride the gerbil-wheel of obsessive circular thoughts. So under stressful circumstances, the left hemisphere's shouting tends to drown out the right hemisphere's whispers. Similarly, during military & other conflicts right-wing dictators (bullies) tend to be elected to power; then they cling to power by starting & maintaining military & other conflicts. 

    So, instead of continuing to "rearrange deckchairs on the Titanic," a wiser practice might be to gently keep returning awareness back to the aspect of yourself that does not change. This aliveness within is recognizable intuitively, by a felt sense. It has qualities of stillness, peace, love, warmth, silence, stability. As we learn to rest & stabilize in this aliveness our behaviour increasingly becomes spontaneously nurturing, arising from the unconditional love of Oneness.

 The late, great Glen Hansard covering the late, great Leonard Cohen's

"Who by Fire"

 

Remembering, Forgetting and Remembering

    We've all noticed how some of us have certain hard boundaries we firmly believe that we cannot step beyond. Some of these seem reasonable, perhaps even life-saving eg a recovering alcoholic refusing to have any alcohol ever again. 
    However, most remarkably firm boundaries are just quirky oddities that needlessly slow or even prevent normal spiritual maturation. These are tied to our rock-solid "story of me" - "my identity" - "it's who I am!!" "I've always hated ... I've always loved ... I could never ... I was always good at ... I've always belonged to ..." We have the free will choice to resist any inner change.

    We also have the free will choice to evolve spiritually - we can choose to awaken! 
    The people I admire and try to emulate become progressively more unconditionally loving, non-judgmental, forgiving, flexible, open-hearted and open-minded. See: http://www.johnlovas.com/2011/12/successful-aging.html and http://www.johnlovas.com/search?q=stages+of+faith 

    “Many people have intimations of their true nature in childhood – the sense of a benevolent presence guiding their life, a radiance that shines forth from all things, or a current of love that unites us all. …
    But we lose touch with this luminosity as we age … we forget who we really are and succumb to the way others see us...
    By adulthood we've more or less forgotten who we truly are, and have passively absorbed the current cultural fad of being frozen in the armor of materialism, meaninglessness & cynicism. Not surprisingly, something in all of us 'continues to weep over the barrenness of modern life.'"
    Stephan Bodian. “Wake Up Now. A Guide to the Journey of Spiritual Awakening.” 2008.

    “We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are.” Anais Nin 

    In other words, our personal worldview & self-concept - be that more materialistic & cynical - OR - tending more towards kindness & unconditional love - is our "state" which determines our experience of life. 

        “There are only two ways to live your life.
         One is as though nothing is a miracle.
         The other is as though
         everything is a miracle.” Albert Einstein

     Jonathan Ashford - from my current perspective - clearly & concisely expresses the most useful spiritual teachings. Below, an excerpt from a recent interview: "A Near-Death Awakening: 'I Came Back Without a Self'" Jonathan Ashford https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cLmOpCCJkuY

    “I could tell you what I was shown and what I understand. I guess you would say what I understand to be true, or truth as it was defined for me, is that we are an expression of unconditional love, here to remember that very thing. So you could say time, through the process of the spiritual awakening, simply exists for you to experience the memory, or the event, or the set of circumstances, that remind you that you are an expression of unconditional love.

            So it (“the Divine,” “Source,” “God,” etc) has a very interesting sense of humor. The sense of humor is you are unconditional love manifest into this form, and now you’re going to forget, and go through everything which is just trying to wake you up to that fact, but you’re going to see it with different eyes. So it’s kind of like the joke is: it’s always been right in front of you. It’s always been right in front of your face, but you’ve always been looking a hundred yards out. You’re always looking to tomorrow, or you’re thinking I need 12 years of schooling to get me there. I need something, when it’s actually been in the mirror the whole time.

            Every circumstance serves you in your awakening to that very fact. And we live several lifetimes, because we miss it. We might live a thousand lifetimes because we just keep missing it. It’s just floating right by us, instead of catching that glimpse in the mirror. Understanding that unconditional love is what we are, and the second we wake up to it, it’s like feeling for the first time every time.

            As it was shown to me, there is nothing to do here. There is nothing to ever change here. There is nothing to ever fix. There is only to live consciously in a way to understand, I am unconditional love being expressed in this moment.

How does that play out? If I remember it, my life plays out to reflect that. If I don’t remember it, then my life plays out to reflect that.

So really, it was the two paths, if you want to call them paths, playing out simultaneously, based on your state.

As it was shown to me, everyone’s like, ‘What’s my life path? What’s my purpose?’ I’m like, ‘Well, just think of it this way. You have choice A or B, all day, every day. And based on choice A or B, you will affect the state in which you affect your existence.

Beyond that, everything else was just shown to either point you to it – or – pull you away from it. So all spiritual belief systems, every book, every definition, every word that we use, every language, everything either points us to it – or – away from it.

But you will only know that if you’re walking in a state of awareness, which is part of the spiritual awakening process. You grow your awareness. I’m now more aware than I was yesterday. And because of my awareness, I choose this particular state. And I might do it a couple of times today, and maybe a couple of more times tomorrow.

Or, I might slip out of it. I might forget it completely. And then those circumstances will reflect that, and try to point me back to remembering it again. So it’s really an exercise in awareness.

Unconditional love is, yes, we are unconditional love. We walk in it, we hold it, we forget it. But the exercise is the awareness, because without the awareness, you won’t remember that you are unconditional love.”

    Jonathan Ashford https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cLmOpCCJkuY 

 

 

Oneness and Othering

     The way we imagine ourselves, our self-concept, depends on what we're looking at and how engaged we feel. 
    If it's a beloved person, pet, activity or even object, we may well feel at-one-with them. Neither we nor our beloved seems to have boundaries. This has been called a Unitive experience or Oneness. It's primarily a felt experience - as one hugs or kisses a beloved, stares into a baby's or very young child's eyes, holds a puppy's head and stares into its eyes, there is simply unconditional love flowing unimpeded both ways. 
    However, the more different, cautious, afraid, angry or especially hostile we feel, the thicker & more impermeable the protective walls we erect. Often we feel superior in some way than the other. We are right, others are wrong. This "othering" is supercharged when there is a perceived or actual power imbalance - "might makes right." The swaggering bully, be it in the playground, school, workplace, bar or political arena, displays psychosocialspiritual immaturity. When such delusion of superiority is capped by "God is on OUR side" - religious exclusivism / narcissism - then ANY behaviour becomes not only justified but "sanctified!" When any leader consistently behaves destructively AND is allowed to get away with it, we're dealing with a dangerous cult. Sadly cult members often remain ardent followers to the bitter end. 

    "Tom was in his mid-thirties when a truck he was working under fell and crushed his chest. He had a very elaborate near-death experience (NDE). There were many parts of it, but one part was his life review. He went back over every event in his life in minute detail. He said, ‘I could count the number of mosquitoes that were buzzing around me at this time, which he couldn’t have done during the event, but in the NDE he did. And he said, ‘Not only that, but I experienced everything through my eyes and through the eyes of other people involved in the scene.’ He described one incident in particular, when he was a teenager, driving his truck down the street, when a drunk man wandered out in front of him. He jammed on the brakes, and was furious at the man for almost denting his truck. So he rolled down the window and started yelling at the man. And the man, being quite intoxicated, reached his hand in the window and slapped Tom across the face. You don’t do that to an angry teenager.
    So Tom got out of the truck, and started beating the man up. And he left him a bloody mess on the median strip. Now Tom tells me, when he relived this in his life review, he felt it through his own eyes – the adrenaline rush, the rage. And he also felt at the same time, through the eyes of the drunk man – the humiliation of being beaten up by this kid, the 32 blows of Tom’s fist in his face. Now Tom couldn’t have told you it was 32, but reliving it anew in an NDE, he felt 32 of them. He felt the man’s nose getting bloodied, he felt the man’s lower teeth going through his lower lip. And he came back realizing we’re all the same thing. There’s no difference between me & that man. It’s like if you’re looking at your fingers, they look like they’re separate things, but they’re really connected, and you can’t cut one off without hurting them all. So the Golden Rule for near-death experiencers is not a guideline, it’s the way things are.”
    Dr. Bruce Greyson - "After" 2023: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ViCWJWHR0a8

    Before his NDE, Jonathan Ashford had nothing to do with religion / spirituality. During his NDE, he like most ND experiencers, was welcomed with unconditional love. He now understands that the Divine has no interest whatsoever in which quirky little religion, if any, you belonged to. The Divine likely inspired Emo Philips' comedy sketch: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ANNX_XiuA78

    “Never do to others what you would not like them to do to you.” Confucius 500 BCE

    Increasingly, people understand the Golden Rule from a non-dual perspective ie that my neighbour, myself & the Divine are one & the same - ONE entity manifesting as infinite variety of appearances, including everyone & everything: spiritually independents, scientific materialists, agnostics, atheists, theists, "president-for-life" dictators, drug dealers, petty crooks, mosquitoes, dogs, birds, fish, trees, rocks, mountains, oceans, earth, sun, moon, clouds, sky & cosmos. Divine non-dual infinite potential self-reflecting by manifesting as & exploring duality - the material world of opposites.

    “A mystic sees beyond the illusion of separateness into the intricate web of life in which all things are expressions of a single Whole. You can call this web ‘God, the Tao, the Great Spirit, the Infinite Mystery, Mother or Father,’ but it can be known only as love.” Joan Z. Borysenko PhD

     On manifesting as humans, we tend to forget our true nature, AND also forget most of our wisdom. Awakening is remembering who we truly are - and - how to live appropriately as 'dual citizens' of non-duality & duality.

    So, no matter who we think we are, let's be kind, humble & pull together like wise, nurturing grandparents.

 

You HAVE to Try THIS!

     Okay, you don't 'have to,' BUT I sincerely recommend you do, because this is a surprisingly simple but not easy "game changer."

    1) Become aware of your Mood or overall Attitude. 
    Unless you feel: Open & Curious to ANYTHING that might happen, Ready to Learn & Evolve, and Grateful to be Alive, then DROP YOUR BORING, DEADENING, SELF-DEFEATING MOOD. You've done shit mood & "ordinary unhappiness" (or worse) to death. It's time to LIVE!

     2) FRESH START EVERY MORNING!
    Anything, ABSOLUTELY ANYTHING can happen today! None of us have a clue how our day will go when we first open our eyes. YET, a pessimistic or anxious, or one of our other pet shit moods loves to rush in to pathologically distort our attitude for the whole day. This is our fear-based choice akin to people choosing to return to a familiar abusive home rather than 'risk' a new safe house. BE BRAVE! Admit you don't have a clue about the future, NOR can you micromanage the future. The best you can be is PRESENT: Not Knowing, Relaxed yet Alert & Energized, Ready to Learn & Evolve, and Grateful to be Alive. 

    3) PRESENCE
    This is relatively rare, YET simple, ordinary, AND feels joyful. Have you ever been somewhere with so many overwhelming noises that you can't think clearly? For most, the source of the overwhelming noises is our own "self-talk" - the ongoing dialogue from our small self. We, as individuals, "need" a "noisy ego" like we as a society, "need" a narcissistic dictator taking a wrecking ball to our world ie like we need a hole in the head. 95% of our self-talk is useless or harmful. We CAN ignore self-talk, and CAN direct our awareness ANYWHERE we choose. 
    CHOOSE Open Awareness! Open Awareness is a meditation practice that's also the ideal way to be 24/7. When we're not narrowly focused on a specific task such as cooking a meal, or driving, our awareness is wide open to & monitoring all of our sensory inputs, in the present moment. Unless we specifically choose to narrow our awareness down, we remain open, present. This is peaceful & joyful because it's so effortless & freeing - free from our infernal neurotic, fearful, anxious self-talk. TREAT yourself to this experience - even for a minute - to appreciate the miraculous peace. This peaceful 'liminal space' feels energized at the same time, a bit like a helicopter that has risen off the ground hovering, yet able to take off in any direction when it chooses to do so.

    This 'everyday miracle' is YOURS to enjoy, yours to LIVE. It's your birthright! You WILL kick yourself if you delay letting go of needlessly living in 'ordinary unhappiness' or worse.

    

small self vs Self

St. Michael Defeating Satan (c. 1633) by Guido Reni

     

Helpless - Empowered - Awakening

    How do you feel right now? Frequently checking in on your mood is a valuable practice, because, whenever you find that it's low, and you feel grumpy, irritable, pessimistic, sad, sarcastic, etc - it's not caused by your circumstances, but by broken thoughts. And positive thoughts are instantly available - just one thought away.
    This is not how we usually see it. We're used to seeing things from the outside-in: our external circumstances, be it pleasant or unpleasant, makes us feel accordingly.

    Broken thoughts are the natural spawn of broken worldviews. And more of us than we realize, at least subconsciously hold bleak worldviews. Albert Einstein (1879 – 1955) understood that the most important question we each need to answer, 'Is the universe a friendly place or not?' IF we believe it's unfriendly ... peace is elusive at best." Joan Borysenko. “Fire in the Soul. A New Psychology of Spiritual Optimism.” 1993. So broken worldviews beget broken thoughts & broken moods.

     Michael Neill spent the first 25 years of his life as a "reasonably successful victim." He writes: "I did my best to fight back against the victim voice inside my head with a cacophony of plans and schemes designed not so much to create things in the world as to take me away from my own unhappiness & insecurity. Studying the personal empowerment and success literature, led me to better understand the path he imagined as a continuum from left to right:

HELPLESS --------- EMPOWERED

    On the left-hand side of the continuum we see ourselves as helpless victims of circumstance [of an unfriendly universe]. There’s not much point in setting a direction in life because we believe that we have no choice about what to do – we have to stay married or get divorced, keep working at the same dead-end job or leave immediately, allow ourselves to be bullied or ‘defend our honor’ by fighting back at every imagined slight. 
    But as we become more conscious of our role in creating our experience of life, we realize that we aren’t really helpless victims and we begin to see that even in the direst circumstances we do have some choices, although we may not particularly like any of the ones we’re currently able to see.

    The further we go toward the right of the continuum, the more empowered we feel and the more choices we become aware of until we realize that in any situation we have a nearly infinite range of choices. There are not only innumerable actions we could take (though some of them may take great courage), but we also have choices about our attitude and the meaning we ascribe to whatever it is that’s happening. 
    This would seem to be the pinnacle of possibility on the empowered path of life.

HELPLESS ------------- EMPOWERED 
Victim                                 Creator 
Fear                                   Courage 
No Choice                            Choice

    Compared with the quiet desperation of being a victim, the testosterone surge of empowerment felt amazing. I set my direction, planned my work, and worked my plan. Yet in the back of my mind, I knew something was off. I was beginning to meet with some extraordinarily successful people. Many of them were just like me – happy & confident when things were going well; petty & desperate when they weren’t. We wore masks of arrogance or indifference to hide a head full of insecurity & fear.

    But some people I met seemed to be on a different path, even though they had many of the same things that I was working so hard to achieve. As I looked to see what was different about them, I realized they were following inner wisdom instead of outer goals. They still wound up getting somewhere in the game of life. It’s just that it didn’t matter so much to them where that happened to be. 
    Instead of striving to be the predominant creative force in their life themselves, they delighted in being conduits for a creative force – the principle of Mind – that existed far beyond the consciousness of the fragile ego-mind. In short, they allowed their life to unfold from a place of connection with a deeper wisdom that seems to be an innate part of the human potential. 
    This opened up a new possibility for how to live in the world: 

HELPLESS ---------- EMPOWERED ---------- ENLIGHTENED* 
Victim                          Creator                                Conduit 
Fear                            Courage                                Insight 
No Choice                      Choice                               No Choice

    I call this enlightened* approach ‘the path of the soul’ because I’ve learned that the moment someone begins to follow their inner promptings & live insightfully in the moment, their life begins to unfold with a beauty & perfection that their own best-laid plans never seemed to have. It’s as if their own soul is designing the perfect path and laying it out in front of them, one daily brick at a time. 
    When we begin to see the illusion of our thinking more clearly, we realize that in a world where our experience is being created from the inside out, mastering the circumstances of our life is the booby prize. That doesn’t mean we might not wind up with a big house or a nice car – there’s nothing wrong with tapping into the abundance of the universe if the opportunity comes our way. It’s just that we’re unlikely to spend too much time chasing the dream of success when we’re awake to the dream of life. 
    Once we start to recognize the feeling of our innate wisdom, we realize that when it comes to setting our direction in life, we don’t really have that much of a choice after all. This isn’t because we’ve gone back to being victims, but rather because we’re pretty much always going to go where that inner wisdom directs us. Not because we ‘have to,’ but because not going where the intelligence behind life wants to take us would be self-defeating and a little bit silly."

    Michael Neill “The Inside Out Revolution. The Only Thing You Need to Know to Change Your Life Forever.” Hay House, 2013. HIGHLY RECOMMENDED CONCISE VALUABLE BOOK

    * Like a growing number of meditation teachers, I understand evolution of consciousness as a life-long process rather than a sudden, once-and-for-all, complete transformation. Therefore I prefer the term "awakening" over "awakened" or "enlightened."

 

    To derive maximal benefit from Neill's advice above, immerse yourself in Sydney Banks' mystical insights by way of his books & online interviews. Here are just a few:

    • "Much of human suffering comes from the mistaken belief that we are fundamentally broken. We’re made of the intelligent energy that animates everything in life. So we’re actually made to thrive. We’re not born in original sin, we’re born in original grace, and then we learn all this other stuff that makes it really seem – because we’re living in the feeling of our thinking – like we are messed up, and we are problematic, and we do need to fix ourselves, and change ourselves in order to be okay.
    • True spirituality is not something to attain, but something we already are 
    • Peace begins when we trust life more than the anxious strategies of the mind. When we get caught up in the machinations of the intellect it becomes considerably more difficult to hear the whispers of a deeper intelligence. 
    • When clarity & purity of thought are present, the answer you seek will present itself, for what you seek is with you and has been with your always. 
    • In the silence of our minds lies creative incubation, bringing the wisdom & joy we all seek.
    • Everyone in this world shares the same innate source of wisdom, but it is hidden by the tangle of our own misguided personal thoughts.    
    • Healthy compounds – feelings, such as compassion, humility, love, joy, happiness and contentment – are all rooted in positive thoughts. 
    • Hate, jealousy, insecurity, phobias and feelings of depression are all compounds of negative thoughts. 
    • All feelings derive & become alive, whether negative or positive, from the power of Thought.
    • Every human mind has direct access to its experience here on earth, and the human mind always has access to its own spiritual roots … from whence it came. 
    • The Universal mind, or impersonal mind, is constant & unchangeable. 
    • The personal mind is in a perpetual state of change. 
    • All humans have the inner ability to synchronize their personal mind with their impersonal mind to bring harmony into their lives. 
    • Some believe the brain and the mind are the same. But there has to be a power behind the brain to make it function. 
    • The brain and the mind are two entirely different things. The brain is biological. The mind is spiritual. 
    • An important thing to realize is that Universal Mind and personal mind are not two minds thinking differently, but two ways of using the same mind.
    • The world in the form of Nature is a reflection of the human mind, which creates an illusionary gap between the spiritual and the physical. This gap, in turn, creates the duality of life. Trapped in this duality, our minds become full of disillusionment and lostness. 
    • As the human mind ascends in divine consciousness, the gap between subject and object begins to vanish and the oneness of life emerges.
    • There is one Universal Mind, common to all, and wherever you are, it is with you, always. 
    • There is no end or limitation, nor are there boundaries, to the human mind." 

    Sydney Banks, "The Missing Link: Reflections on Philosophy and Spirit.” Lone Pine Publishing, 1998.

Kevin - P. Michael Lovas photo

Starting the Hero's Journey

    I boldly suggest that each one of us is on our own individual hero's journey, and will complete it in this lifetime, or after an unknown number of lifetimes. Most of us don't seem to be in any hurry, however, completion - awakening - does eliminate tremendous amounts of needless suffering. 

     In the forward, Angelo DiLullo dedicates his valuable guidebook to awakening with, "to anyone who, from this moment forward, is willing to forgo comfort and predictability to venture into the unknown in the name of truth." We do love our comforts and can quickly get very upset if our wifi is unexpectedly lost for a few minutes.

        “… we live in a society of endless distractions and any of these can be used to avoid discomfort. Well, when we take up an investigation of our deepest truths, we are voluntarily putting ourselves in situations that, by nature, make it hard to distract ourselves. As we do this, we will often notice some discomfort. Sometimes it is a mild uneasiness. Other times it might feel more intense. Either way it can be tremendously helpful to simply acknowledge the discomfort. ‘Okay, I am feeling uncomfortable. What is it like? What does it feel like in my body at this moment? Do I have to do something to immediately distract myself like my thoughts or habits suggest, or can I just be with it?’ You might be surprised. What you’ve been running from for years might turn out to be tolerable, even enjoyable after a time.

    ‘The ultimate measure of a human being is not where he stands in moments of comfort & convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.’ 

    Martin Luther King Jr. 

 

    Perhaps you can only sit with the discomfort for a few minutes at first, and that’s perfectly acceptable. Over time you will start to recognize that you have an innate capacity to relax into whatever the body is feeling in the moment. With this relaxation, you may notice an alchemical process. The restlessness & discomfort will begin to transform into an experience of presence & wholeness. An intuitive realization might dawn – the discomfort itself was not what was making us distractible, restless, & irritable. These were only side effects of the habitual activity of running from our emotions. With this realization, we start to recognize that there is intelligence in discomfort. It is like a messenger telling you, ‘Look here!’ This will begin to replace the old habit pattern that seems to say, ‘Run away!’ As we experientially recognize our capacity to sit with these processes, a certain spontaneous willingness begins to emerge. We see that by voluntarily opening to the intelligence of these uncomfortable moments, we are simply acknowledging what is already within us. We recognize that to run from these experiences is to run from ourselves. We’ve done that for too long, haven’t we? All that running is what is causing our suffering. This separation from ourselves is what perpetuates that sense of separation from others, and from life itself.

    You will find (awakening) to be the adventure of all adventures. 

    BUT if it’s not your priority at this time in life, then by all means, put it aside and pursue what most authentically moves you. This book will always be available if you choose to return and readdress this matter. There is no judgement from me or the Universe. If you genuinely feel that it is your path to be an exceptional parent and raise a family, then that is exactly what you should be doing. If you want to throw yourself fully into art or music, then that is exactly what you should do. If you feel genuinely moved to pursue a life of scientific investigation, then by all means go do that. This is your life, so doing what feels most authentic and relevant to you regardless of social expectation is what will be most fulfilling."
    Angelo DiLullo MD. “Awake. It’s Your Turn.” 2021. VALUABLE GUIDEBOOK

    After my awakening experience, "everything changed. Everything changed. What really stunned me, I was in the middle of really a lot of turmoil in my personal life at the time and literally an hour before my awakening, there were all the problems I was dealing with in my life, and an hour later there was no problem anymore. And this has absolutely nothing to do with the denying of facts. This is not about denying that things are not working, or that it’s some kind of inertia or lack of action or downplaying or denying the reality of the situation. It’s because the narrative drops. When the narrative – the thought-created narrative – is not there, then you actually get to have a very clear view of the situation, rather than overshadowed by the narrative. There was a situation, I can tell you with certainty that happened following this awakening, that would have been really shocking, really painful and devastating, had it happened before that awakening. I would have been devastated. It would have broken me. It would have broken me. And yet here I was, in that situation, dealing with it with such clarity and grace that I never thought I would be capable of. I was completely stunned by the lack of drama that I know otherwise would be there. Was there pain? Yes. Was there shock? Yes. But there was such clarity of perception and knowing how to navigate this situation that really was both personal and impersonal at the same time. It even stunned Michael (Neill – my teacher at the time) because when I told him that, he went very quiet. He was speechless because he got to hear what I witnessed and the details of what was so shocking and painful, and when I then told him how I dealt with it and shared with him how I saw everything, he himself went quiet and he said, wow, unbelievable, even I think I would lose it in the same situation.” 
    Angelo DiLullo “Academics to Awakening! - Interview with Maggie” 
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cvqlmackJN0  

    "If the doors of perception were cleansed everything would appear to man as it is: Infinite. For man has closed himself up, till he sees all things thro' narrow chinks of his cavern." William Blake  

Leonard Cohen - "What Happens to the Heart?"

Old Stories - OR - Directly Experiencing Reality

    I resonate with the nondual teachings of people like Lisa Cairns, Helen Hamilton, Gangaji, Angelo DiLullo, Henry Shukman, Louise Kay, Eckhart Tolle, Adyashanti, Richard Rohr, James Finley, Rami Shapiro, David Steindl-Rast, Norman Fischer, Rumi, Rainer Maria Rilke, etc.

    "I believe that, whatever we’re going to call it – God, Kali or whatever – is a nondual Reality. I don’t believe that there’s a God separate from Nature, who created the world, who judges us, and all that. I’m not a dualist. I’m a nondualist. And so I’m interested in the nondual aspects of Hinduism and Vedanta, in Taoism and Zen, Christianity, Islam, wherever – they all have this nondual perspective among their mystics. I’m interested in that. I will play in all those arenas, because I think they’re all leading us to the same ineffable experience. When you’re talking about that nondual reality, the labels are irrelevant. And I mean, every religious tradition has this mystic element. And because the mystics understand that - God or whatever they’re going to call it - can be experienced directly, in, with, & as you. And I’m interested in that experience. But that’s not what the conventional religious teachers tell you."
    Rami Shapiro "CHALLENGING BELIEFS: Are You a VICTIM of Spiritual Misguidance?" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9rZLlvXFQ7k 

 
    "The final stage of love is nondual love, or love before division, or love before separation. Love where there is no person or thing to love. There is just love recognizing itself. So, when love looks at something, that love sees itself in a different disguise. It doesn’t see a person or a thing, only recognizes itself."
    Helen Hamilton – “The Pathway of Love” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IWkkmLx1G6Y 

    “Vigilance is awareness of what does not disappear even when objects appear. Whether those objects are exquisite or horrible or mundane, always there is awareness aware of itself. Whether those objects are emotional or mental or physical, always there is awareness aware of itself.  
    Pure vigilance must be an ease of recognition; otherwise, there is doing vigilance, and this is already not vigilant. When you hear this thought, Now I am going to do vigilance, ask yourself, ‘Who’ is doing vigilance? This is direct self-inquiry. You will see that it is quite natural to be aware of passing objects as well as aware of what is aware of both passing objects and itself. 
     It is a mistaken understanding that implies vigilance to be a burden. The real burden is the denial of your beingness as awareness itself. The idea that vigilance is a burden comes from the concept of spiritual practice. You are admonished to practice. ‘You have to keep your practice.’ 
    I don’t know what the word practice is translated from, but it is a bad translation, because in English practice means some kind of preparation for a real event. You practice for the football game. You practice for your recital. So I don’t use the word practice in terms of vigilance. I am talking about being vigilance. Be that right now. You are that already. Recognize yourself as that, and be vigilant to your true nature. Then see. Without looking for anything, see. 
    In Western culture, particularly in America, we are trained to know what is going to be ahead and to attempt to make it be what we want it to be. This is why there is so much suffering here, trying to force life to be something based on a particular concept. Then we search for agreement with that concept and fight any disagreement of that concept. Even if we are victorious in our fight, we are left unsatisfied, unfulfilled. 
    Wait and see doesn’t necessarily mean you sit on your couch and never move. It also doesn’t necessarily mean that you get off your couch and move. It is much deeper than that. An active life can be lived as vigilance, and an inactive life can be lived as vigilance. 
    There will be many insights. There will be many revelations and deepening experiences. In the midst of it all, be vigilant to what has not moved, what has always been whole, what has always been radiant & unpolluted. There will be even deeper insights. Enjoy them as they come, wave them good-bye as they pass, and be vigilant to what has not moved, what has not been lost by the experience of loss, and what has not been augmented by the experience of gain. 
    Be vigilance. The deepest joy of the human experience is to be vigilant. It is not a task. It is bliss itself. A bliss that is awake & vigilant to what never moves, to what is always present. Be that. Then you will see that this entity called your lifetime unfolds exquisitely, as a flower unfolds. As it begins to die, it will die exquisitely, as a flower dies. You don’t need to dip it in wax so that it will stay forever at a certain stage. Death is not the enemy. Fear of death is the enemy. Fear of death is the result of the misidentification of yourself as some particular entity. Your true identification is the sky of being.”
    Gangaji. “Freedom and Resolve. Finding Your True Home in the Universe.” Hampton Roads, 2014. VALUABLE little book!

 

    May this guided nondual (30 minute) meditation help you feel into, remember & re-experience deep calm, homecoming & peace - that you (& everyone & everything) already are, have always been, & will always be: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DkhrKy4FStE

 

    “Have patience with everything that remains unsolved in your heart. 
     ... live in the question.” Rainer Maria Rilke